Getting in some practice

The past two days have been so much fun for me. My sister-in-law is back at work and wanted to wait a couple of more weeks before my niece started daycare. This allows them to save some money and the family to get some one on one time with Grace. So I took the last two days off work to spend with my three month old niece Grace.

She is just the cutest little girl and really good too. We spent the days playing, talking, singing songs, reading books, and of course cuddling. I could not pass up some cuddle time with the sweet little baby girl while I was there. However, I did make sure not to hold her too much while she was sleeping so as not to spoil her.

I figured this was some good practice for when we bring our baby home. I quickly learned the difference in her cries. I learned that she has not yet learned patience and when she wants to eat you better be ready. Most of all I learned that if you hear her making noise on the monitor you don't play around about checking on her or she will be wide awake by the time you do. I have often worried that I would not hear a baby cry if I was asleep. However, this morning I learned that was not true when I fell alseep while Grace was napping she cried and I was up and moving. Overall, I think these were good days with lots of special memories of Grace.

While I might feel like this was good practice my Sister in Law was quick to say a newborn is harder. I guess you can't ever really know what to expect but hanging out with Grace can only help. Here a couple of pictures of our time together, although when you get the camera out the smile is gone and it is all serious time.

The Next Steps have Begun

This afternoon we had a call with the adoption agency. The director was very kind and spent time going over every detail with us. She is very passionate about her job and it is clear that no one will work harder to help us through this process. She quickly made us feel comfortable and let us ask all the questions we had. Chad and I both felt a huge relief knowing what we are facing and knowing that there is a plan.

We will be signing the contract with them and moving foward with adoption. The next steps will be to create a family profile that will tell a Birth Mother about us and to do a home study. The agency has a professional that will help us build the profile which is a comfort to us. I was really dreading figuring out how to but a family profile together but this will provide us guidance.

I have found myself sitting and reflecting on our journey today. I feel like we were truly meant to adopt a child. It seemed to me that as we went through all the infertility treatments everything seemed complicated and so uncertain. I am not saying the adoption process will not be complicated but it seems as though things are falling into place. I have to believe that God has guided us here for reason and we will be blessed with the right child for us. I pray that God will continue to be with us and guide us on this journey.

I thank you all for your support in this journey. Your support means more to Chad and I than words could ever explain. We just ask that you continue to pray for us and the child we will bring home.

Acceptance

Today, was a day of good news for Chad and I! I woke up this morning with a good feeling and at lunch it was confirmed. I opened up my email and found that we had been ACCEPTED by the adoption agency! I quickly contacted them and set up a conference call for tomorrow. The call will allow us to ask questions and for them to explain our next steps. Step one = Check, Tomorrow we will find out what is next for us.

The Room at the End of the Hall

In the times that Brandi and I have discussed how our home would accomodate a child, the room at the end of the hall has been the unanimous choice for a nursery. It's purpose in the recent past has been storage, or a place for things that are 'out of site and out of mind'. It included a dog kennel, games, shoes, cds and dvds, my dresser, and clothing that no longer fits.

Earlier in the year, we finished the attic to add storage space in efforts to clear the room out. I had my good friend Nick Stamper come over help me add plywood and transfer items up through the crawlspace. Over many weekends Brandi and I have sorted, organized, purged and donated our way towards our goal - an empty room that would become a fun and comfortable place for a child.

This weekend was no exception - we have a cedar chest to rid ourselves of and we are working to find a solution for some other items, but we're almost there!

So, just now I allowed myself to walk into the room and envision what it may look like with a new coat of paint and baby furniture. Sitting in the rocking chair and looking at the empty walls was a curious feeling - I can almost see in my mind what the room will become. I wonder what it will be like when someone (that I do not yet know) applies their personality to it as they grow up and makes it their own. Brandi and I even indulged ourselves and placed some color swatches on the wall - the beginning discussion over the important selection of the color of the room. Is this too bright? Too bold? Too drab? Will it MATCH all of the Winnie the Pooh stuff that we will bestow upon the child?? I'll leave you to guess how the discussion went, and both of us had fun bouncing ideas off of each other.

This journey is such an enlightening one. The anticipation I feel is so strong and different than anything I have felt in the past. I can't wait to meet the little person who will put the finishing touches on the room at the end of the hall.

Agency Update

Today the agency we applied with called me and we ran into a little snag. They informed me that to receive the full adoption services we need to be a member of their church. We are not members so they can only offer to help us through consulting services and the home study. The women from the agency was very nice and took time to explain everything to me.

I hung up the phone and had to run to a meeting which is probably the only thing that kept me from a complete meltdown. I just had all these memories from the failed fertility treatments come flooding back and started to feel like this was not going to work either. I finished my meeting and then it was time to go home. Chad was still at work so I called my mom to talk through my frustration and fear. I calmed down and realized it was not that big of deal and just a little bump in the road. No one said the adoption process was easy and this is probably one of many more frustrations to come.

So with myself now calm I began to re-group and figure out our next move. I had an agency that was my second choice when we were looking for agencies. So I pulled up their information again and took a look. When Chad got home we talked through our options and decided to apply with this agency. So we sat down submitted our application and moved forward with becoming parents. The agency we are working with now is called Everlasing Adoptions. We should hear within 7 days if we are accepted with them. The only thing that could cause a delay is that they only work with 40 families at a time so we do run a risk they will be full. However, we will cross that bridge when and if we get there. I am not going to worry any more about it. We will become parents it is just a matter of time.

Background

So you are probably wondering why this blog is called Navigating the Broken Road. Well when Chad and I got married we had the Rascall Flatts song "God Bless the Broken Road" sung. For us this was the song that best spoke of our journey to find each other. Little did we know at that time that we would travel a broken road together in a journey to become parents.

About 3 years ago Chad and I decided that we were ready to become parents. We thought it would likely happen in a few months. However, after 6 months we began to suspect there was a problem. However, we were assured by doctors not to worry yet. At about 10 months of trying I noticed there was something off with my body and went to the doctor. The diagnosis was PCOS (Polycystic Ovary Syndrome) and they started me on medication to treat it, however there is no cure. Well after several months we still had no baby so we started using Clomid. After 3 unsuccessful months of Clomid we were referred to a specialist. At that point we tried 4 rounds of IUI with no success. We felt like it was time then to move to the next step. So we started off on the complicated and expensive journey of IVF. Only once again last November we found that unsuccessful.

We took several months off to weigh our options and determine what our next steps would be. We had exhausted all the funds we had for additional treatment and considered a loan to help with the cost. We were introduced with the idea of using an egg donor to help us conceive. After many conversations and many prayers we decided to pursue adoption.

I feel like all this struggle we have been through to be parents is so that we can help a child who would otherwise not have a happy home. I know that we can provide a loving home for any child and think that God has a plan for us to help someone else.

So once we decided on adoption then we were left with the question of Where do we start? So we started researching adoption agencies and contacting them for information. Chad had a friend that recently adopted and told him about their agency Hannah's Dream Adoptions. They are a wonderful Christian organization that provides adoption services. We submitted our pre-application yesterday and should hear if we are approved within 30 days. Then we will begin the journey of paperwork, background checks, references, and a home study. However, all of this will come with a large cost. Once we are home study ready we can apply for grants for help but we still have to pay about $3000 just to get that stage. So we are asking for your help. No donation is too small and all donation will only be used for adoption cost. There is a button on the right where you can donate using Pay Pal. If you want to use check or cash just let us know and we can give you our address.

For now we will pray for God to be with us in this journey ask you pray for us too!

Welcome to our Blog

We have started this blog to share information about us and our journey to grow our family. We hope you will check back often and share in our journey!